Have you ever felt stuck in your life because of a small failure? Don't know how to deal with it? Of course! everyone fails at one or the other point in life. It's Normal
People focus on how to achieve success, but What If, one fails?
What if we give you that must-know tips for Free? Then, even if you fail, you won't get affected by it and you will surely march on towards your goal.
Failure. Photo by Nathan Cowley, Andrea Piacquadio & Keira Burton on Pexels.com
Let me first tell you a Story for better understanding,
There was once a very hard-working and sincere person just like you,
That person wanted to become a world-class researcher. Therefore, decided to choose the path of engineering from IIT (One of the most prestigious colleges in the world for engineering) to achieve the goal. Gave the entrance exam but fails to clear it.
At that point in time, it looked like it was a total failure but had two options in hand.
Case1: Enters into Depression by following Fixed mindset.
Case2: Try to give your best efforts in the second attempt, thus, following a Growth mindset.
If suppose we fail again in 2nd attempt.
Case a: Enter into Depression
Case b: Join an average college. Focuses on learning instead of criticizing (environment) and finding faults in his parents, teachers, situation, etc…
Thus, if a person focused on learning he can then apply for a master's at a prestigious institute later in life, thus, ultimately reach his goal of becoming a world-class researcher.
Failure is not like striking a domino set. Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com
Thus, one failure won't necessarily affect other things as if a chain reaction. There is always a way!
You must always see failure as a part of the process of becoming someone great.
Life is a cycle of (so-called) successes and failures. An ideal individual must not be affected by any of these.
This doesn’t mean that you should neither learn from failure nor celebrate success. It's just that you must not be led astray from your path due to these.
The best thing about failure is that it does not affect us directly. Instead, we are the ones who contribute to our upsetness as correctly explained by Sir Albert Ellis in the Quote,
“People don’t just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.”
Thus, Failure is NOT permanent!
You must always remember that in any event, occurring in the world surrounding or including us is a product of both:
Environment Factor
Individual factor
The exact ratio varies from situation to situation but instead of just focusing on “Self” you must focus on the “process”.
Fixed V/S Growth mindset: (Dweck, 2006)
Dr. Carol Dweck explains to us two types of mindsets:
Fixed mindset:
As per my understanding of this, we often tend to focus on “Self”, and its capabilities.
This leads to the desire to be perceived as smart/capable, etc.
Thus, we get fixed to a level and we don't try any harder.
2. Growth Mindset:
But when we have a growth mindset, we consciously try to focus on “Process”.
This leads to the desire to learn and become more capable.
Thus, we have a chance of growth and we will try to improve ourselves, and eventually, we will succeed.
To understand it better:
When following a Fixed mindset, we often limit our potential as I (Ego) comes in between. This fact is also pointed out indirectly or directly in many religious texts such as Sloka 59, 18th Chapter of Holy Gita, explaining that ego has limited powers, thus lead to limited results. (Savithri, 2013)
Whereas if we follow a Growth Mindset, Focusing on “The Process”, we have a chance to improve. This also well stresses that one must focus on Karma, not the result… As in Bhagavad Gita, Shri Krishna says:
“tasmad asaktah satatam karyam karma samacara asakto hy acaran karma param apnoti purushah”
When people are process-oriented they have the freedom to improve the current situation by rethinking the decisions and strategy. Whereas if people have a person-oriented mindset then they feel stuck thinking that it was them who were once capable and now they are of no use as the circumstances have changed.
Failure must NOT be personalized!
Conclusion:
We hope that by now you might have understood how we can deal with failure. If not, then please keep checking our blog for more content regarding how to deal with failures and adversities more effectively.
Please Note: Please do read our "what have we learned today?" section below to recall and memorize the Secret to handle failure
Just remember the 3 points in mind every time you encounter failure:
Failure is not like striking a domino set.
Failure is NOT permanent!
Failure must NOT be personalized
What have we learned today?
You learned the three secrets to handling failure
Failure is NOT like striking a domino set.
Failure is NOT permanent!
Failure must NOT be personalized
Growth Vs fixed mindset.
Failure is Normal.
It doesn't affect us directly, we contribute towards our own misery.
Accept Failure and move on! (but remember to learn from your mistakes.
Lastly, but not least there is always a way! :)
Also, Happiness increases by sharing it, So Please Do share this and make a difference.
We would love to hear your story of handling failure, so please do share it in the comment section and we will share it to inspire billions!!!
References:
Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. Random House.
Savithri, K. (2013, September 6). 18th chapter of Holy Gita and sloka 59: Ego is false. https://Www.Speakingtree.In/. https://www.speakingtree.in/blog/18th-chapter-of-holy-gita-and-sloka-59-ego-is-false
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